Yeah, today has been interesting to say the least. I woke up at 6:30 instead of 5:30. No, not becuase of the time change, but becuase somehow my alarm was set to buzzer instead of birds. The buzzer was so soft I didn't hear it going off for an hour. So I got out of bed...ate some cereal and put on my clothes. I had to leave by 7. Well I left at 7:15, wearing dirty pants, my hair hasn't been washed since saturday and I am wearing a shirt 3 sizes too big. First thing I do when I step out the door is trip over a brick and land on my face. nice move. Then I think...gee the trash needs to go to the curb. So I try to wheele the trash down there and I fall again! Then I get to the end of my cove and stop so I can make sure no one is coming and my 1/2 gal water bottle flys off my roof and the sportscap breaks off. my water all over the road and a dry mouth. So I grab it up and head on to work. Absolutly no one was playing music on the radio and I was disgusted w/ my cds. Been a tough time waking up today but the day is flying by.

Over the wknd we tried to stay busy. On friday we went to celebrate Katies birthday. We went to piccolos and they forgot to bring me my food. So by the time i got my food everyone was done and I took two bites and asked for a to-go box. :) yaay! On sat we got to meet up with Molly. We haven't visited w/ molly for quite a while. SHe is an old friend of ours. Then we went mullet spotting at Wal-mart. Now that is fun! I spotted 2 fem-mullets, a kid mullet and a what the hell were you thinking mullet. :)

When I went to the doc on friday they told me that I would have to have physical therapy. Uhg. Not what I want to do becuase of the cost. it will cost me about $120 a month in co-pays! Now if I were not saving for scotland, that might be something I coudl handle...but if my pain is caused by stress and I have to get more stress to pay for this than what is the point? Anyhow I am trying not to by much if any food so that I can keep the expense down. I will get some stuff for the wknd so brian doesn't realize whats going on I guess. But I did tell him that I am not eating during the week. Either he didn't want to realize it or didn't know what to say. No guy wants to hear about his chick talk about her fatness. And no guy wants to know that the love of his life starves herself. If I could explain it, I am sure I could cure myself. otherwise I can only hypothosize. Do i look ok right now? Probably...everyone else thinks so. Why do I need to lose weight? Becuase I must get smaller. I feel too big and bulky. LIke I take up too much space. I am imperfect. SO I keep on trying. Will i get there? Maybe...but where is there? there keeps changing. As soon as I think I am there, there is someplace else.

Well ebay is going ok. I am kind of scared becuase I have some stuff ending really really soon and no bids on it. Plus I am going to put up some lulu stuff and there already is some. But mine will start much much lower. Cuase i am cool :) ANyhow I am going to go think some positive thoughts :) Oh and drink more coffee :)

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