2nd today

OH tired...oh so tired.

I laid the smack down with my subordinates...worked out ok. I'm just so tired! It's pouring down here, and I am sure that we are in for some pretty crappy flooding. This place floods terribly!!!

I just got out of another meeting. Another place to smile and nod.

So much more to be done! I have 120 certificates to make, some time records to correlate, an 8 inch pile of papers that need filing, several notices to send, 150 badges to make for the conference, and reservations to cancel and then some.

I just want some noodles. Yes noooooodles. Or faux meatloaf and mashed potatoes. Comfort foods :-)

My weight gain is becoming more apparent in my face. Ehgads. Not going to even look at the scale till I can fit back into my pants. It will be too upsetting, I'm sure. WHy add to my stress and depression right??

I tried to talk to b last night about how I am feeling. I explained to him that every day I want to die. it's constant, no matter how happy I pretend that I am. He gets so upset and frustrated with me. But I know it's becuase he cares. It's becuase others end up feeling so useless. They want to do something but there is nothing that can be done. *shrug*

But he feels that I need to do more for myself. I wish it were that easy. I explained that I get through the work day and that is more than enough.

-pb

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