2nd entry today

Like I mentioned earlier I sat and chatted w/ jeff last night. (hmm...sat and chatted...as opposed to what? Standing and chatting? Running and chatting? Eh, I'm just being silly.) Had a good ol' time for several hours on ICQ.

Last night I asked him how he felt about hearing certain more intimate details about interactions w/ brian. I inquired about this out of respect for his feelings. Obviously I'm still living with this man under the guise of a real relationship and I am a very sexual creature...I can't help but pursue intimacy w/ brian even if it means rejection or dissatisfaction w/ the outcome. Prior to Jeff and I admitting to feelings for each other, I spoke freely about things and so did he. I tell him things that I just don't talk about to other people. he has that effect on me.

So (I'm rambling...off topic) I asked how he felt about hearing things of an intimate nature and he said he was just fine w/ it. that he liked hearing of my escapades. That's good. I already knew he wasn't a jealous sort of man but I didn't want to make him uncomfortable. He admitted that he had been trying not to discuss his own past intimate events for much the same kind of reason. I assured him that it's fine with me. No problem there. After all..he has experienced lots of good times with other people. There isn't any reason he should have to tuck those away. The fact that he has loved other women only reminds me more about how caring and fantastic he really is.

I also told him that it would be fine with me if he ever decided he wanted to have another girlfriend. I mean...I'm allowed to...why shouldn't he? I want him to be as happy as possible, and anything that makes him happy makes me happy. But he said he really didn't have any interest in having another girlfriend...and didn't anticipate that he would change his mind about that. That's fine with me. If he want's me to be the center of his universe....I'll gladly step up and be his world.

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