<< Dancing Nancys >>
2004-04-09, 2:09 p.m.

2nd entry today

So it has been another long day in the life of PB. The governor was not kind enough to call in a reprieve for all of us employees today. Sometimes before a holiday he calls the day off around noon. But apparently it's not gonna happen today. oh well. I'm not worried about it.

I have been compiling a mailing list of all the churches in San Antonio. Bah. It's boring. But it's still important work nonetheless. I would explain more...but I don't want to give myself away.

It's friday and what am I going to do??? *hmmmm* Dunno yet. I could finish up all of my ebay stuff and get it all online this wknd. My Clairebear needs to do her papers, so I really don't want to interrupt her.

Speaking of Clairebear....I worry about her so much sometimes. SHe has gotten herself to the point that she can no longer relax w/o alcohol or xanax. She defines herself through her grades. not through learning or mastery, but through the grades. Her life is enveloped in those numbers. She worries so damn much becuase she feels that people will hate her and that she will be kicked out and fail at any given momen. This chick has a 4.0. She hasn't anything else to define her. I spoke to her about getting a hobby or taking the summer off to volunteer at something. She has nothing but school and work.

We all have things that define us as an individual. B is a computer geek and a pagan. Brandon is a greasy guy that loves to play w/ his truck. He's known for being laid back and fun. Johnny is a social butterfly. Defined through liters and liters of lager. I'm the artist, the hippie, vegan weird pagan one.

I am sooooo incredibly hungry for attention today. It's driving me mad!!! I want to jump up and down and say "look at me! Play with me!" But I don't. I can get conversation...that's not tough. I can find that and enjoy that. But NEED to be touched and held so badly. I need to kiss and be kissed. I need to hug and be hugged!

Touch me touch me touch me!!

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