3rd of the day

I am really looking forward to leaving today. I am tired of this place. so tired.

One thing I have noticed about my medication is...I don't have deep complex thoughts. It seems that I am almost incapable of them. When I think I feel a soft, squishy, bouncy surface in my mind...and ever time I try to probe deeper I just bounce...like I am stepping onto a moon walk. But it is a reassuring bouncy. When it bounces me back, I get a sense of...."Oh it's ok nothing you really needed here in the first place." But I do! But I do need it!

I fear I have become a whiney pain in the ass. I grump a bunch, and complain about my health a whole lot. As much as I love brian, and I love him a lot...my life health was pretty damn squeeky before I met him. My only problem was obesity.

Well I have on pantyhose today. Men, I am sure most of you will not understand the tyrany of pantyhose. The push and the pull. The tug! I am opposed to cheap pantyhose. I refuse to wear them, as they look horrid! So here I am wearing a nice pair and my legs look absolutly flawless! (which is a blessing considering my clumsy childhood scars and the dermatillomania) However, the torso of my pantyhose is digging into my rib cage. And if it isn't digging there...it rolls down and creates a stacked doughnut effect on my stomach. Call me old fashioned, but I feel that if unless your skirt/dress goes to the ankles, you should wear hose.

I really need to get a new garter belt and some stockings. I stopped wearing them when I got really fat, as it started to look like a straight jacket for my ass. But they really are practical. I think I saw some cute ones at victorias secret. I like those old school ones that are almost girdle like and are longer w/o a belt between the stocking and clip. They were so darling. So 1940's. Well it's my fav era...go figure that I love the lingere from that period.

Well that is enough about stockings, and medicines and my whining and ranting.

I have one important message for all of you today: Hydration. Drink water. I am sure you don't get enough.

Pb

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